The Wedding
by Imaginary1.x
Summary: With Alice planning the wedding and the ceremony passing without incident there was nothing that could go wrong, right? Wrong! With Bella Swan, the Cullens and an unexpected guest or two; the rest of the wedding is bound to be a disaster! R
1. AN

**Authors Note! I'm sorry people!**

**Okay This story was previously on my Beta's Profile. All the Authors notes at the ends of the chapters, were in regard to the reviews it had on HER profile.**

**Thank you,**

**xx LittleMissShy93**


	2. The Ceremony

The Wedding

Summary: _With Alice planning the wedding and the ceremony passing without incident there was nothing that could go wrong, right? Wrong! With Bella Swan, the Cullens and an unexpected guest or two; the rest of the wedding is bound to be a disaster! _R&R plz! Rated for language.

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Twilight Series or the Extremely HOT Cullen men. They are property of the fantastic Stephanie Meyer! **

_A/N: This is my first shot at humour! Let me know what you think! Previously Published on my Beta's Profile._

Chapter 1 - The Ceremony

Bella's POV

This was not even possible, let alone plausible; this had to be a dream. I looked down to see my perfect wedding dress. Was it really my wedding day? It must be seeing as Alice and Rosalie were putting the finishing touches on my make-up and hair.

Both Rosalie and Alice looked amazingly beautiful in their bridesmaid dresses. Their dresses were beautiful floor length, pale blue gowns with a corset-style top and flowing skirt complete with pale blue stilettos. Just looking at my soon-to-be sister in laws made me think how ordinary I looked.

"You look beautiful Bella." Rosalie said quietly, not making eye contact as she continued to straighten my veil.

I smiled at Rosalie's compliment, which I felt sure would be the only one that I would get for a very long time, for after the wedding Edward had agreed to change me into a vampire. Alice moved in front of me then and smiled straightening the front skirt of my wedding dress.

"Rosalie's right, you look amazing and you have nothing to worry about the wedding will go smoothly." Alice reassured me.

I know she meant well but truth be told, I hadn't even been worrying about the wedding going badly, I was more concerned about Edward changing his mind about changing me into a vampire. Thank you very much Alice, now I have something else to worry about. Me being Bella Swan meant that the wedding was definitely _Not_ going to go smoothly.

Alice steered me in front of the floor length mirror and smiled as I finally saw myself in my wedding dress. I had to hand it to them, I did look amazing. My wedding dress was simple and elegant; it was similar to Alice and Rosalie's dresses but even better. In fact it kind of looked like a princess's dress. The veil fell perfectly over my face, and was as long as my dress.

I heard the door open and turned to see Charlie in a black tux standing completely still in silent awe. My father walked towards me, lifted my veil carefully and kissed me on my cheek then replaced the veil. I smiled nervously and he laughed.

"You aren't nervous are you kiddo?" Charlie said trying to keep his voice steady, but i could tell that he was the one that was nervous.

I shook my head lightly, lying. "Nervous, not at all; what about you?" I asked smiling.

Charlie shook his head, like father like daughter we were both terrible liars.

"Bella, Charlie, The wedding is about to start!" Alice said visibly excited.

Charlie and I took a deep breath at the exact same time as he hooked me arm in his. Alice ran forward and got the door. She and Rosalie were in the hall first and were quickly met by Emmett and Jasper who were neatly dressed in black tuxedos similar to Charlie's.

When they saw me, they froze and their mouths dropped open involuntarily. I, of course, blushed and looked down. The boys looked like they were going to say something to me but stopped when the traditional wedding march came on. Instead they smiled and looped their arms into the girls'.

_**(A/N: The song that I was listening to while writing the 'ceremony' [below was 'Chasing Cars' by Snow Patrol, it sounds so much cuter than a wedding march! Sorry Please Continue Reading!)**_The next set of doors opened and Alice and Jasper walked down the isle first, after a few steps Rosalie and Emmett went. Charlie and I waited a moment then made our way down the isle.

The minute I saw the amount of people that had attended I blushed, but managed to keep my head up. The ground was covered in red rose petals and, heres the shock of the century, it wasn't raining! It wasn't sunny but it wasn't raining, which means hazard number 1 (slipping on wet ground) was gone; now there were just four hundred more that I had to look out for.

I finally looked to where I was walking when I saw Edward. Suddenly all my worries were gone, and I was speechless at his perfection. He looked stunning in his Tux, his bronze hair blew in the slight wind and his topaz eyes were warm and excited. I smiled at that exact moment and I felt as if the rest of the world and all the people in it had just disappeared.

Before I knew it Charlie and I were in front of Edward. Once again Charlie lifted my veil and this time kissed me on my forehead then replaced the veil over my face. Edward walked towards us slowly and Charlie placed my hand in Edward's, giving me away to my soon to be husband. Edward nodded towards my father and walked me up to the alter where Carlisle was waiting to perform the ceremony.

I found it very difficult not to laugh as I saw Carlisle in the complete priest outfit with one of those little white collars. Edward and I locked eyes and didn't look away throughout the ceremony. I was still in a daze when Carlisle finally spoke to me.

"Do you, Isabella Marie Swan, take Edward Anthony Cullen, to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold; through richer or poorer, through sickness and in health, till death do you part?" He said in a soft voice.

Wow, had we already exchanged rings? I looked down to see a gold band accompanying my engagement ring so I supposed we had. I decided it would probably be best to answer now.

"I do." I said in a small voice.

Carlisle smiled and spoke softly once more. "I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

Obediently Edward lifted my veil then wound his arms around my waist and pulled me up to him in a passionate kiss I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. When I pulled away I only then noticed all my friends and family and all of the Cullen's guests clapping and cheering.

Edward smiled at me once more before we took our first steps as husband and wife.

**DISCLAIMER: Shocker here I ALSO don't own Snow Patrol or Any of their Fantastic songs! **

_A/N: Okay I have already thought of the first guest but if you have any preferences about whom the second guest should be leave a review and let me know! Any-who! Reviews Are Like Cookies Which I live on so please review! _


	3. The Photographer & Bella

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Twilight Series or the Extremely HOT Cullen men. They are property of the fantastic Stephanie Meyer lucky woman... **

_A/N: Read & Review! I need more reviews! Plz_

Chapter 2 - The Photographer & Bella

Bella's POV

Good News is I didn't trip at all as Edward and I mingled with the guests; Bad News is it was getting close to photo time. Joy of Joys, I was definitely going to make a fool of myself and personally Edward wasn't helping one bit. You see every time that the photographer came anywhere near me Edward let out a low growl.

I noticed the photographer this time in particular; he was watching me, only me, extremely intently and suddenly I didn't feel as bad about Edward's growling as I had before. The way the photographer looked at me kind of reminded me of a stalker; I shuddered involuntarily. Edward being super observant noticed this and called to Alice under his breath.

I watched as Alice made her way through the crowd, human speed, and found her way over to my side.

"You sure can pick them Alice." Edward growled under his breath, nodding towards the photographer who was STILL eyeing me.

I turned my head towards Edward's chest trying to avert my vision away from him. I saw Alice discreetly take a look in the direction of the photographer before gasping. "Oh my Carlisle; er what is he thinking Edward?" She said quietly, but loud enough for me to hear.

Edward went quiet for a moment then growled a little too loudly for Alice reached past me and whacked Edward in his gut causing a small boulder-like-crash. Edward gave her a death glare (excuse the pun) and wound his arm more tightly around my waist protectively. This was not good at all.

"Let me put it this way, what he is thinking at the moment; is something only _I_ may think about _my wife!"_ Edward growled emphasizing the 'My Wife' part.

Alice's mouth made an 'oh' shape before smiling then she nodded finally understanding.

"Well If it's any consolation, he won't be the one with Bella tonight; you will I can assure you." Alice said with a devilish grin on her face.

I of course blushed scarlet while Edward once again growled quietly. "Alice this is the first and only warning I will give you; Stay out Of That Part of Mine & Bella's future!"

Alice giggled and danced away from us towards Jasper.

"Oh My Carlisle, his thoughts are getting worse by the second." Edward groaned quietly.

I turned around to face him and kissed him as passionately as I could; given the circumstances of my stalker/photographer and 400 obstacles having the potential to cause grievous bodily harm to myself and several others. Edward kissed me back and from the corner of my eye, I saw my stalker wonder off into the trees.

When I broke away from the kiss I looked up and smiled at my husband. As Edward smiled back, once again everything around me disappeared and I felt at peace...for a brief second.

"Oh No; you won't believe who is here." Edward said quietly.

I looked to where Edward's gaze was; my mouth dropped open in shock at who our unexpected guest was.

_A/N: CLIFFY! HAHAHA! I am evil! Anyways Thanks for the suggestion and next chappie will be up ASAP. __Bella's photographer has no name at the moment... think of him as 'Freaky Photographer Guy' until I think of a name... Short Chapter Next one will be a bit longer, I hope. My choice for the guest will come in a later chapter, the second guest comes next chapter!_


	4. An Unexpected Guest

**DISCLAIMER: I STILL do not own the Twilight Series or the Extremely HOT Aro, Marcus & Caius from the Volturi. They are property of the fantastic Stephanie Meyer! **

_A/N: If you even bothered to read the disclaimer for this chapter then you were correct in reading that I think the Volturi members Aro, Marcus & Caius are HOT! Especially Marcus... My mind works in funny ways hehe... ANYWAYS! Edward might be a little bit OOC in this chapter. On with the story!_

Chapter 3 - An Unexpected Guest

Edward's POV

I had first noticed his long black hair tied up neatly in a pony tail. I then noticed that at least he was dressed appropriately, in a black tux with a deep crimson tie. He caught my eye and made his way, by himself, towards me.

"Oh No; you won't believe who is here." I said quietly to my Bella.

First with the photographer that was thinking entirely inappropriate thoughts about my Bella and now _HE_ was here, WITH NO SUPERVISORS! He is going to ruin this wedding. I sighed as Bella followed my gaze she gasped but what was stranger was that she seemed relieved. Relieved for Carlisle's sake, did she not know what he could do unattended? We have to warn Bella's mother and all the other women at the wedding.

Oh Dear Carlisle, he is 6 feet away from us; I wonder how many people would notice me pick Bella up and make a run for it? Too Late! CARLISLE SAVE US!

"Congratulations Edward, Bella!" Aro said pulling us into a giant bear hug.

Oh My Carlisle, kill me now! Guests were beginning to look over. My Bella gasped and said quietly. "Hi Aro, can you please let me go, you're hurting me just a little bit."

Aro of course didn't listen but let go of me to hold Bella even closer kissing her close to her ear. Bella instinctively froze and soon Aro let go of her, but not as soon as I would have liked.

_Oh Edward please don't be ridiculous! I wouldn't dream of trying anything on Bella, her mother on the other hand..._ Aro thought to me.

I shuddered as Aro's thoughts turned somewhat perverted as he thought of my mother-in-law. Aro chuckled at my reaction and offered some more congratulations then stalked off towards Renee. A disgusted look overcame my face, I was sure that Jasper would feel the revulsion that I was feeling.

"Is anyone sitting here madam?" I heard Aro ask in a smooth voice. Was that supposed to sound seductive?

"Umm... Not at all..." Renee struggled to reply gesturing to the chair beside her.

What the hell is wrong with her? Did she really find Aro's voice, shudder, _'seductive' or 'attractive'_? Beside me I felt Bella swallow hard.

"Edward, why is Aro talking to my mom? What was he thinking?" Bella asked me concerned.

Oh My Carlisle, what do I say? I can't exactly tell her the truth which is that Aro wants to nail her mom and probably all the other woman (dead or alive) that was attending what was supposed to be a joyous occasion between Bella & I. I'm sure my Bella would find me weird and insensitive if I told her the truth. What to say?

_Oh My, I've never felt this way about Charlie or Phil. I wonder how he is related to Edward. I mean it's not as if he is MY blood relation so it wouldn't do any harm and what Phil doesn't know won't hurt him..._ Renee thought. HOLY SHIT, she thinks Aro is related to me! Not only that, but she wants to do him! HELP SOMEONE, ANYONE!

I noticed Bella's eyes bulge as Aro swept a strand of hair that had fallen out of place behind Renee's ear. Oh my Carlisle this was disgusting to watch, even from a distance! Aro leant his head closer to Renee's right ear and his lips gently brushed it. Oh no, this is going to take some explaining! I was beginning to panic slowly, Oh My Carlisle what am I going to do? So many women to warn not nearly enough time!

"I...I...I...Aro...he...umm." I stuttered as Bella's glance never left Aro and her mother. She opened her mouth in shock and began whimpering, I looked over to investigate.

If I had a heartbeat, it would have stopped. ARO WAS GETTING ROMAN HANDS! OH MY CARLISLE! His lips traced her jaw, oh well there goes another habit that I had reserved with Bella! The look of horror and revulsion never left Bella's face as she saw each and every move that Aro made on her mother and how each had left Renee breathless.

Suddenly when I thought Bella & I would die from embarrassment, Carlisle appeared and tapped Aro on his shoulder and managed to pull him away from Renee who looked disappointed that they were interrupted. SHE WAS DISAPPOINTED, WHAT WAS SHE DESPERATE OR SOMETHING? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO HER AND PHIL? I MEAN HE WAS AT THE WEDDING JUST A FEW TABLES AWAY FOR PETE'S SAKE!

Bella relaxed by my side as Carlisle led Aro away and looked over towards Bella & I and gave us a reassuring smile. I wish it had worked because I still felt uneasy, the thoughts running through Aro's head were inapt but as he and Carlisle passed a group of Bella's girlfriends, Angela, Lauren, Jessica and a few others, his thoughts got atrocious.

I shot a horrified look in Carlisle's direction and he understood immediately and his walking pace soon became a human-speed jog. Bella looked at me with wide eyes wondering what was going to happen next.

I squeezed her hand reassuringly. "The worst is over." I lied through my teeth; I could tell that things were going to get a hell of a lot worse.

_A/N: Thank you to __**Alunamai**__ for the suggestion about Aro! I hope I did him justice! I will continue to write about Aro in future chapters. Sorry That Edward is a little OOC, I just thought that this behaviour suits a situation like this hehe. I might or might not change POV again, most likely will. Review Please!_


	5. Breadstick Adventures

**DISCLAIMER: I really do not own the Twilight Series or the Extremely HOT Cullen Men! They are property of the fantastic Stephanie Meyer; she really is an amazingly lucky woman whom I am not! By The Way, I also don't own Charlie from Two & A Half Men OR the Show 'Two & A Half Men' I have no idea who they belong to, but whoever it is, IT ISN'T ME.**

_A/N: __Thank you to __**Alunamai**__ for the suggestion about Aro! This chapter is all about Aro annoying Carlisle. By The Way Carlisle's nickname in this story is pronounced _Lyle - ly. _Also use your imagination for the Breadstick thing. _;) (That was supposed to be a wink. Lolz)

Chapter 4 - Breadstick Adventures

Carlisle's POV

"Don't touch that!" I snapped. Oh God, where was a straight jacket when you needed it?

"Aww has little Lislie got a bad temper!" Aro said in a baby voice, eyeing a girl in her late teens while fiddling with a breadstick.

Oh my goodness, run girl run!

This is exactly why I don't invite Aro to weddings! He is nothing but a...Oh Dear God what is he doing with that breadstick now!?

"Aro put that down now!" I growled. Now I knew how mothers with disobedient children felt.

Aro dropped the breadstick on the table, but very close to the edge. He took a deep, unneeded breath and sighed.

"Lislie, which came first: The chicken or the egg?" Aro asked in a bored voice.

I slowly turned my head and gave him a death glare. "How in HELL am I supposed to know that? YOU SHOULD KNOW! You are more than 800 years older than me!" I hissed under my breath.

"Fine... I'M BORED!" Aro whined picking up the breadstick again.

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. I WAS having a nice time before Aro showed up. I noticed Aro blink twice then a cheeky grin came across his face, oh my goodness; what is he up to?

"Daddy?" Aro asked in a fake British accent. I ignored him. "Daddy?" He asked again in the same fake accent. I ignored him. "Lislie?" he asked. I ignored him. "Carlisle!" He exclaimed, but pronounced it: Care - LYSE - L

I silently seethed and through gritted teeth asked, "What do you want Aro?"

"What type of panties do you think that, that girl is wearing?" He asked grinning while watching Bella's 'friend' Lauren and doing...strange things with the breadstick.

Oh my god. "Where is Caius & Marcus? Or the guards? Where do they think you are?" I asked trying to changing the subject.

He grinned and turned to me and said quietly. "Oh they are ... er _Distracted_. Hehe, you see, I did this disappearing magic trick: while Heidi was in the showers; I stole all of her clothes and gave them to the homeless shelter. At the moment I suppose she's running through the castle looking for some form of clothing, naked. So I think that the _male _guards are a little distracted. Then again that female guard Marcy seems to be a dyke, so maybe she would enjoy it too."

He was now doing worse thing with the breadstick, I pity it. Oh God! Now I feel sorry for inanimate objects. He is EVIL!! Had he no boundaries? My god he should be locked up, he's Friggin Mental! Oh my GOD! Doesn't he get enough action at the Castle? What with his hundreds of vampire-guard girlfriends.

"Don't you have enough girlfriends?" I hissed as he leant back in his chair, checking out another of Bella's school friends.

He looked thoughtful for a split second before he spoke in a serious voice. "Nope I don't." I was about to say something when the breadstick, steered by Aro's hands, disappeared beneath the table. I don't even WANT to know!

He lent forward in his chair and leaned across to me. His pale hands reached for my black jacket and my burgundy tie. I had changed clothes since the ceremony and was no longer in my 'minister outfit'. I moved backwards in my chair as if to get away from this insane person but it didn't work as he moved closer and closer towards me. Just one more inch and he will have... Oh there he goes! He has penetrated by personal space, so much so that I can smell his minty fresh breath as he opened his mouth to speak as he fiddled with my jacket and tie.

"You know if you would, unbutton your shirt and lose the gay tie, you would have ladies falling over themselves for you as well and you wouldn't be so jealous." Aro said seriously, trying to unbutton by jacket and remove my tie. His long fingers ran down my chest for seemingly no purpose at all, touching me in a way only my wife was allowed to!

"Back off Beetle Brain! WHOA!" I exclaimed leaning so far back in my chair that the chair flipped and I now lay face down on the ground.

"Bugger! That looked like it hurt. Are you alright there Carlisle?" I flipped myself up immediately at the sound of Aro's worried voice.

"YOU ARE A PSYCHOPATHIC PERVERT! GET AWAY FROM ME!" I whisper-yelled.

"Carlisle, I think that you hit your head pretty hard, I have no idea what you're talking about." Aro said seriously.

"You...you tried to undo my jacket & my tie, you stroked my chest AND you were calling me Lislie! Plus the BREADSTICK!" I exclaimed.

Aro shook his head. "My God I'm losing my mind!" I exclaimed once more.

At that Aro laughed loudly. "I'm just screwing with your mind Lislie! All that junk really did happen, especially the Breadstick. But technically I succeeded in undoing your jacket; partly your shirt & I took off your tie!"

I looked down and sure enough my jacket hung loosely on my shoulders my tie was no where to be found and my white shirt's first 5 buttons were undone!

"I feel violated!" I whispered crossing my arms over my chest, hugging myself.

_Where on earth is my tie?_ I thought as Aro laughed nervously and turned slightly to the left. _Why on earth is he nervous? What on earth has gotten into him as well, touching me like that? Something has gone seriously WRONG since the last time that we'd seen each other._

I saw him take _MY_ tie out of his jacket pocket and bring it up to his face and inhale. I sat there stunned for a moment as Aro quickly replaced the tie obviously not knowing that I had seen what he had done and turned to me grinning. Weird.

_A/N: This chapter was extremely fun to write, especially the tie-sniffing part! Lolz. This chapter was a little wrong, especially in the Carlisle-caressing part! Lolz_


	6. Mr Snuggles

**DISCLAIMER: I really do not own the Twilight Series or the Extremely HOT Cullen Men! They are property of the fantastic Stephanie Meyer; she really is an amazingly lucky woman whom I am not!**

_A/N: Sorry It took so long to continue. Anyways here is the new chapter. Review._

Chapter 5 - Mr Snuggles

_Bella's POV_

Oh my gosh, did Aro actually just make a move on Carlisle? Calm Down Bella. Your wedding has gone fairly well considering. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I quickly turned only to have Edward kiss me softly. My mind went blank. Wow, I really don't think I'll be able to stop that reaction.

"Bella, Love, don't worry about it okay? Forget Aro is even here." Edward told me reassuringly.

I nodded, of course. I mean what else am I supposed to do? Shout hysterically that I can't not worry. No. I will remain calm. I hope.

_Alice's POV_

HAHAHAHAHA!! Oh my goodness, Carlisle's reaction was priceless. I turned to Jasper to see what his reaction was, just to see him smiling slightly watching me laugh.

"What?" I laughed.

He lightly shook his head, still smiling. "You truly are beautiful when you laugh."

Aww isn't that cute. I leaned in towards Jasper and kissed him. He pressed his forehead against mine and he continued smiling.

_Carlisle's POV_

Oh my gosh. What the Hell Are They doing here?? Well I suppose with all the other vampires here, they were bound to find out. As I stood up, Aro proceeded to try and brush the grass and dirt off my suit, moving his hands a little too slowly for my liking. Where the hell was Esme?? Why wasn't she protecting her Mr Snuggles. I heard laughter. I looked across the room and saw Edward laughing his head off. Oh My, I forgot he could read minds.

Through his gasps of unneeded breaths, Edward choked out, "Mr Snuggles! HAHA! Mr Snuggles!"

"Really, well would Mr Snuggles like to play?"

I slowly turned my head towards Aro, a frightened look was plastered on my face. I edged away from him, feeling the horror wash over me. Aro was smiling, not a friendly 'We're just friends' smile but a 'Lets do it' smile. I could feel myself gagging. I had to get away from this madman. I continued edging away, backwards, always facing him - I was scared what would happen if I turned my back. I continued backing up until Aro was nothing more than a distant shape, smiling, always smiling. I backed until I ran straight into our new guests.

"Argh!" I cried out.

"Are you okay Carlisle??" One of them asked tenderly.

The others looked concerned, a little too concerned. Gosh, It's enough to be hit on by Aro, but by them too? Esme would be furious if she knew... or would she? She hasn't shown up to save Mr Snuggles yet... would she ever? I heard laughter again. Damn Edward.

"Aro... Flirt... Me... Sick... " I stuttered.

She bent down and whispered reassuringly in my ear that it would all be okay. Should I trust her?? Well My supposedly loving wife wasn't here saving her Mr Snuggles from this torment and abuse, so might as well.

_**A/N: Well Thats all for now, Please Review. Can you guess who the new guests are? Review.**_


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